Attitude Readjustment With an Ax

The day dawned with another month of Milwaukee’s blustery cold weather ahead. I was out of wood the size I needed for the woodburner that heated the entire downstairs of our home. I’d never split logs or used a chain saw before, but we certainly needed the wood. The house, especially the family room and my office downstairs were cold without the heat produced by the woodburner. Could I do it?

I was afraid to use the heavy, sharp equipment. Finally I heaved the ax down over my head and slammed it into one log after another on the chopping block. Most times I missed the log completely. My shoulders ached, my hands shook. But two hours later there was a pile of wood ready to be cut to sixteen-inch lengths with the chain saw.

Terrified that I would cut through the electric cord or myself, I started the saw. Sawdust blew everywhere…on my neck, in my face. I worked on, sweating, aching. A blister developed on my thumb and the pain in my lower back brought me to tears.

I wondered if there was, indeed, a God who truly looked out for us. I hated being a single parent responsible for everything for my four children. How can I be expected to take care of it all, I wondered. The house, the yard, the snow shoveling, the groceries, the cooking, cleaning, driving the children to all their activities, paying for all their activities, trying to be a good parent to four different children in four different schools, my own job at the radio station, my social life…ha! What social life? And now this...splitting and sawing wood for the woodburner. I bellyached to myself the whole time I was sawing that wood.

Several hours later, the wood pile was restocked. As I shook sawdust off my jacket, I felt like Paul Bunyon. I’d done it myself, by golly, and I learned something more valuable than how to work a chain saw. I learned that with determination, inspiration, perspiration and sometimes with a whining prayer or two, I can do anything. Anything at all.

That day I learned to stop bellyaching so much and bask instead in a job well done.